Friday, 30 April 2010

Wacky Search Terms – April Edition

wacky keywords april 2010Here’s the latest round up of weird and wacky search terms that people have punched into Google and stumbled across Law Actually.  As ever, we’ve got some real corkers in there!

“what can i do with a Blur completed with LLB” - do with a what?!?

“santa's sleigh risk assessment” – are Kwik Fit offering this now?

“i hate pupillage portal” – doesn’t everyone?

“secrets of pupillage” - I can feel another book idea coming on!  ;-)

“UK law final exams torrent” – you want to download, WHAT?

gmail inapprpriate pictures showing up in my attached pictures - oh yeah... that's what they all say!  :p

“Can you revise for llb law in one week” – what do you think?

“what can be legally sold in the street literally” – as opposed to... figuratively? :-$

“what is the name of the ink pen that lawyers use” – oh, please! :p

“What is the cut off age for a career at the law bar in uk” – There’s not!. Remember, old lawyers never die; they just lose their appeal.  wah-wah-waaaaah!  ;-)

“why is it a law to wear seatbelts?” - are you kidding me?

“law degree in itunes uk” - beats looking for it as a torrent I guess.

“how to revise quickly for law” - left it a bit late, have we?  :p

“dentist dropped tooth and root down throat” - wow... I'd stay the hell away from that dentist.

“can't get pupillage” - diddums... I'm sure you're not the only one.

“law student get laid” - is that an offer or an insult?  :p

“typical LLB hourly charge” – that’s a new one... are students charging to be taught now? Why didn’t I think of this?!?!? ;-)

“best thing to do the day before an LLB exam” – panic!

“how likely is pupillage through pupillage portal” – do you really need to ask?

“how many hours a day should i revise for my law llb exams”– lots I would say, if you’re turning to google for help with this.

“one week till my llb exam and i haven't started revising!” - Uni Looni... is this you?  Don't say you've screwed the pooch for the second year running!!!

“is hell really real” - LOL

“what is the symbol for lawyer” - *skull & crossbones*... just kidding ;-)

“why im suitable for LLM in criminal law” - If you’re having to Google the answer to this, you’re probably not suitable at all! 

“holiday arrangements honoured when undertaking pupillage” - wow... most people would give their right arm for pupillage (as well as selling their grannies and whatever other family members they deem necessary).  And you're bitching about whether chambers will honour your holiday arrangement?!

“what are law students like uk”– I would say they’re a varied bunch on the whole... :-$

“when am i getting sweres staten” – when are you getting WHAT?  :-$

“personal injury how much can i get for been knocked off a moped” - nothing.  Anything moped riders get, they had coming to them. Don’t look at me like that! :-)

“their was a shoplifter in HMV plymouth uk on Saturday” - really?  How about that.

“librarian moped” - don't tell me, it's got a near-silent engine and super-quiet tyres :p

“solicitors' hell” - clients that don't pay on time!

“how much time to revise for LLB exams” - how about, 'as long as it takes?'  :p

“Diary of a Sex Addict” – hehe... and you swung by Law Actually ;-)

“stinky tube” - dirty.

“can law lecturer fight in courtroom” - yes, they are granted a special dispensation.  ;-)

“can i just revise from revision guides llb law” - well, you can... but ...

“failure to wear seat belt and bidly injury” - oooh, sounds nasty.  No one wants to injure their bidly after all!

“day in the life of an older law student” – well, let’s see here now: I have a nap around 11 in the morning and again around 3 in the afternoon. I always wake up for countdown and deal or no deal though and I take a break from studying in the evenings by going to bingo! :p

“homemade flamethrower injury” – talk about bringing it on yourself! :-0

“is calibri a suitable font for a dissertation” - it worked for me

“girl walks into sewer”  I think I've heard this one.  Still, it makes a change from, 'a man walks into a bar'.

Wednesday, 28 April 2010

What kind of reviser / studier are you?

It’s revision / study season and in recognition of the agony students are currently going through, here’s my latest version of ‘what kind of ... are you’.

I think this will be something all of us in the blawgosphere can relate to, though perhaps we should keep the fact we exhibit behaviour falling into some of the less desirable categories to ourselves.  ;-)

What it really means

We Say



The Crammer

You know you should have found that motivation to start revision before now but, you know.... things... kinda.. came up.

(hmm.. they always do, don’t they?)

If you do well in the exam(s), you won’t have deserved it.

And you know, deep down, that’s true. ;-)

A bit more dedication next time / learning from past mistakes, eh?

Despite what you’ve told yourself all these years, you don’t actually work better under intense pressure.

The Self-Righteous ‘Low Voltage’ Student

You’re as cool as they come and, guess what, you haven’t even done 10 minutes of revision.

Oh really?

We all know you’re actually bricking it / have been studying like a neurotic beaver* for the past 6 weeks - or both.

Counselling / drowning yourself

No one likes a clever dick*

The Sunshine Student

You’re a narcissistic, sun-worshipping
a-hole, sat on the grass around campus ‘revising’... we all know you’re really ogling students of the opposite sex.

We hope you sit on a thistle, get badly sunburnt and stung by a wasp.

Sitting at your desk once in a while. Just face it, sitting outside ‘starring’ at a page is about as useful as peeing in the wind.

Revision shouldn’t be enjoyable

The Couch Potato

You’re as lazy as sin and you couldn’t care less.

God bless you

Getting off your fat ass once in a while.

Do you want to be stuck in an endless cycle of re-takes, only to be ultimately failed and given a ‘diploma’ instead of a degree?

The I-need-my-daily-dose-of-Prozac

You’re a hyperactive freakoid buzzing in and out of your revision notes (and around your increasingly frustrated peers) like a demented gnat. 

Try and get a handle on things.. you’re bringing everyone down with your negative energy.

Staying off the coca cola and candy.

Everything in moderation remember. Wait! That shouldn’t apply to revision!

The Serial Retaker

“This time is the final practice run... no, for real this time.” Don’t tell me, you’ll really, really study hard for the retakes?! :p

You’re f*cked

Doing everyone a favour and drop the hell out

You’re just not cut out for Uni... better accept it now than later.

The Steady Eddie

You’re not exactly going for pole position, but you’re hopefully on course for a ‘desmond’ (2:2) if you hook everything up...

Turning the wick up... relying on a few post it notes stuck on walls at this level just doesn’t cut it!

Pulling your freaking finger out!

Because who wants to be relegated to the ‘also rans’?!?

The Slut

You’ve flirted your way through classes this far and have suddenly been left in a panic realising you might have to actually do some work to pass your exams.

No, writing the examiner a seductive note at the end of your script, offering sexual favours isn’t going to get you a first class degree.

Wearing a longer skirt and/or less revealing top and do some God damn work.

Because your ultra short skirt and pert, bouncing jahooblies are lovely and all that, but flashing your goods at the lecturer just won’t cut it any longer.

The I’m planning to cheat in the exam

You’ve spent the study season cramming every spare inch of your casebook(s) with study notes / devised some other (more fraudulent) plan.

We know, you’re just playing the system to your advantage / outright cheating :p

Playing fair for once in your cheatin’ life

You’ll only cheat yourself in the long run... yadda, yadda, yadda... but seriously, what if you’re caught?! :-/

*And please, no sniggering at the words ‘beaver’ or ‘dick’. :p

Monday, 26 April 2010

Man charged with battery after blowing nose all over girlfriend

From 25/04/10:

A 44 year old man from Crestview, Florida  has been charged with battery after his girlfriend told police that he sealed off one nostril and blew the contents of the other all over her.

According to Crestview Police Department’s arrest report, the nostril contained blood and other bodily fluids. The man had been in another altercation which caused his nose to bleed.

The report noted that the woman had blood splattered on her face, chest, arms and pants but there were no signs of any injury on her. The man is due in court on May 4.

I realise you’re meant to share things with your other half when in a relationship but nose gunk mixed with blood really isn’t one of them.

As well as reporting her charming lover to the police, I wonder what else she did to get her own back?!?

I’m also curious what stance the DPP would have taken if this had occurred in England / Wales.

BTW: I had great fun thinking up titles for this post; alas most of them were un-publishable and had to go something conservative in the end!! ;-)

Saturday, 24 April 2010

Pupillage Portal Survival Kit

Pupillage Portal Survival Kit As the Pupillage Portal application deadline fast approaches and applicants across the land are succumbing to 1st degree panic attacks and worse, the Pupillage Portal Survival Kit may be just what you need to, well, survive this mad dash to the finish.

It contains:

Copy of the pupillage portal for cretins yeah, I’m still beating that dead horse.

A bumper pack of caffeine tablets

3 bars of choc actually – yes, we’re still trying to shift the stock which didn’t sell.  (It’s not been a hit, sadly).

12 sachets of super-high-caffeine instant coffee - it's actually common garden soil but what the heck.  If you're battling with the Pupillage Portal, you're a glutton for punishment already.

Novelty USB key for backing-up your saved applications, appropriately in the shape of a wigged barrister... anything for that extra motivation, you know!  :-)

2 special fold-out 1 handed computer keyboards – so you can complete two apps at once when you're really cutting that deadline fine.

Double pack of condoms - well, you never know!

2 waterproof matches - used to prop your eyes open when filling in the umpteenth application.

Newspaper headline letters already cut out - so you can craft those hate letters in advance to chambers which reject you or the  designers / code monkeys of the pupillage portal.

A trashy novel - if things get really bad or you want to slap yourself around the face with it!

2 OLPAS emergency flares (actually sticks of dynamite to be lit and held for an indeterminate period).

Any takers?

Friday, 23 April 2010

Studying law – USA style … in 60 seconds or less

law school tips I stumbled across a post packed full of nuggets of law school wisdom on the quirky blawg of a US law student, curiously named Moonshine Project.  Check out the full post.

Studying - Go apeshit at first… try a little bit of everything. Highlighters, lowlighters, reading every word, skimming, taking notes, making up rap songs about cases, haiku, you name it. … Don’t guilt yourself into a traditional method if it’s not your style.

Great advice.  It’s very easy to fall into the trap of thinking you’ve got to adhere to old-skool ways to be successful.  Not so.

Romance - This may sound formulaic, but trust me. Weeks 1-5, KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS. Make friends. There is PLENTY of time to shack up in weeks 6-15 and thereafter, but once you forego the opportunity to get to know lots of people (not just the sexy ones) and instead burn bridges with short-lived stress-induced relationships (don’t fool yourself into thinking they’re more than that) you will never be able to undo that choice.

WELL KEPT SECRET: You will make some very wonderful friends in law school – chances are your future Wifey/Hubby isn’t the skank you saw dancing on the table at Bar Review… [well, steady-on... don't rule anything out*] but the girl/guy who brought you skittles in contracts because they knew you were on call.

* My comment.  ;-)

Good advice, but likely to fall on deaf ears.  First year law students tend to be a randy bunch and waiting 6 weeks might be a tall order.  In fact, there’s usually a few female law students who are scheduling appointments with the abortion clinic by the time the first reading week comes around.


Attire - For first impressions, go business trendy. What the hell is business trendy? I don’t know… wing it. Girls: try some sharp jeans with a blouse that isn’t buttoned up to your chin (I made this mistake on my first day, which is forever memorialized in our student “facebook”) and a notable accessory to add some personality. Boys: jeans and a polo, or button-up/blazer if you want to be a little extra schwanky.

Wow.  What a difference.  You’d be hard-pressed to find any student in a blazer in most UK law schools (including most of the lecturers), save for when it’s moot court season, of course.  In fact, I’ve seen first year students practically roll up in their PJs.

    Caffeine – Love it!

Can’t argue with that.

Adventures - Have em!  The last thing a lawyer wants to hear about is your friggin journal. They LOVE to hear, however, about that time you were in the City and almost knocked Carlos Santana out with a flashlight.

Hehe... love it.  I’ve no idea who Carlos Santana  .... oh, thanks Wikipedia.  But seriously... who?  :-$

All great advice though!  :-)

Thursday, 22 April 2010

Micky Mouse Gets Sued

disney personal injury claim

From 15/04/10:

Walt Disney World was taken to court this week as a result of a personal injury trial that contests the safety of one of the Disney's Hollywood Studios' most popular attractions, the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror.

An 80-year-old Pennsylvania man, Marvin Cohen, sued the company in an Orange County court, claiming that he suffering a stroke about 12 years ago after taking a ride on the thrill ride drop tower, the Sarasota Herald Tribune reports.

Cohen's personal injury attorneys will attempt to show that their client was physically active prior to his March 1998 ride on the Tower of Terror, which they claim contributed to the artery tear causing a stroke a few weeks later.

Notably, the lawyers are not claiming that a malfunction occurred in the ride, only that the functional ride itself is dangerous.

"This case is about the placement of show or entertainment over safety," Cohen's lead attorney, Barry Novack, told the jurors during opening arguments on Wednesday, April 14.

I guess this is one of those tort cases that could only occur in the US – cue the rolling eyes!   Proving sufficient causation between the claimant taking the ride and suffering stroke is certainly an interesting obstacle. 

Points of law aside, though, this case raises a broader question: are theme parks sailing dangerously close to the wind in trying to provide rides which may literally scare their visitors out of their wits?

Monday, 19 April 2010

Shaking it in the name of the law

legal belly dancer From the Law Society Gazette 15/04/10:

Think of belly dancing and what image comes to mind? To poetic Obiter, it is a scene of lissome ladies shimmering to exotic music while a handsome sheik, mesmerised, looks on.

But now, it seems, the dance is not just for ladies of the desert – it is also becoming popular back in Old Blighty, with quite a few women solicitors taking part. Obiter has gleaned this information from Link, the magazine of the Association of Women Solicitors.

City solicitor Jayne, for instance, says she had ‘hit the glass ceiling’ at work and so turned to belly dancing as something she could enjoy as an alternative to the ‘seemingly unattainable goal of partnership’.

Jayne is not alone. Law graduate Anita teaches belly dancing and is a member of a professional dance troupe, the Baby Bliss Girls. Aspiring solicitor Norsheen Bhatti, the Tory candidate for Stoke on Trent Central, also takes part, while Vanessa da Silva turned her back on a career in the law to become a successful international belly dancer.

What’s the attraction? All these women lawyers agree that belly dancing combines femininity, fitness and freedom of artistic expression. But best of all, it is an opportunity to sparkle in diamante – before putting the suit back on for work the next day, of course.

Wow!  I wonder if any of those ‘limboing’ lady lawyers ever feel the need to take a break a from the day-to-day drudgery of life in practice and burst into a rhythmic shimmying around the office?   If so, who wouldn’t want to work in that office?! 

I guess it could also prove useful perhaps as an effective means of pacifying aggrieved male clients. And don’t look at me like that – lawyers need to play whatever card they have to hand sometimes. ;-)

In all seriousness, though, I guess it’s a good outlet for the professional stresses and strains of working life, with much less stigma than other forms of recreational dance (read: pole dancing).  The real question, of course, is how long it will take for male solicitors to begin to feel left out and want to join the party? 

Thursday, 15 April 2010

Licensed Conveyancers to change name.... but to what?

From: Solicitors Journal 12/04/10:


The Council for Licensed Conveyancers (CLC) is considering changing its name as part of a push to obtain greater rights to regulate litigation and advocacy, Solicitors Journal has learned.

Meanwhile, it has emerged that ILEX Professional Standards, the regulatory arm of ILEX, is to seek extended conveyancing, litigation and advocacy rights for its members.

According to regulatory website, ILEX will apply for the new rights by the end of the year. It has already applied to the LSB for litigation and probate rights for legal executives and to regulate the work of associate prosecutors working in the CPS.

The Legal Services Board’s consumer panel, which backed the CLC’s plans for greater rights, also suggested that a change of name might be necessary.

“Many consumers would presumably expect a professional called a ‘licensed conveyancer’ to undertake conveyancing,” the consumer panel, chaired by Dianne Hayter, said in a paper published last month.

“Given this will not necessarily be the case, the CLC should consider if it needs to change its name or make other branding changes in order to avoid consumer confusion.”

Simon Blandy, director of policy and standards at the CLC, confirmed that the organisation would be considering a new name.

“We want to provide further opportunities for licensed conveyancers and an element of choice for those who are already in the marketplace,” he said.

This is clearly symptomatic  of the continued dumbing-down of the profession; I don’t mean that in a disparaging way necessarily – it’s  just the way things are moving.

The key question, of course, is what the name should be changed to. 

Any suggestions?  ;-)

Obviously, it needs to express clarity to the public, and without incorporating one of the inflated and pretentious suffixes all too common these days such as ‘consultant’, ‘specialist’ or ‘executive’.

Plus, if licensed conveyancers want to broaden their remit, they’ve got to accept the negative trade-off.  While they can currently claim to be ‘specialist property lawyers’ – yes, I know, I know – if they want to handle a wider range of work, some of that speciality is going to be lost.  Naturally the title needs to convey that, while at the same time making it clear to the public that they aren’t, in fact, solicitors.

Or maybe that distinction is growing less important now?

Wednesday, 14 April 2010

Primark drops its padded bikini for seven-year-old girls

From the Times 14/04/10:

Primark, the clothing chain, today ordered padded bikini bras for girls as young as seven to be removed from sale immediately after criticism that they sexualised children.

The company apologised for any offence caused by the £4 item and said profits from any bikinis already sold would be donated to a children’s charity.

Nice save. Possibly.

The Children’s Society lambasted the High Street store for “premature sexualisation and inappropriate advertising”, while Shy Keenan, a child protection consultant with Phoenix Chief Advocates, which helps victims of paedophiles, called for a boycott of Primark until the bikini top was withdrawn.

David Cameron also intervened in the row and condemned sale of the item, which came in candy pink with gold stars or black with white polka dots, as “completely disgraceful.”

Bully for Dave, eh?

[Previously] Asda was criticised for selling lace lingerie, including a push-up bra, which were aimed at young girls, and Tesco withdrew a pole-dancing kit which appeared in its toy section. WH Smith announced last year it was also withdrawing Playboy stationery, including a pencil case, but refused to say if this followed criticism about the brand being sold to schoolchildren.

Wow. To be a kid again would be scary I think. I dread to think what ‘accessories’ came bundled in the pencil case but imagine it might well be something that would make a seasoned employee of Ann Summers blush.

© Masterfile
Model Release
Girl Holding up Bra

Sunday, 11 April 2010

The Ultimate Pupillage Portal Guide


Pupillage Portal for CretinsSick of those Pupillage Portal applications?  Tired of trying to snare that elusive pupillage, only too aware that you’re surrounded by countless others in the same boat, all poised to pounce on the same opportunity?  Yes, it’s that time of year again: BVC-ers past and present have all joined the pupillage race, and have flocked to the Pupillage Portal in droves to submit those precious applications.  Fortuitously, help is at hand with the the brand new book, The Pupillage Portal for Cretins – which Law Actually is proud to endorse.

Penned by long-time ‘rejectee’ Carly ‘the chancer’ Collins, the book leads the reader on a helter skelter tour of how to play the portal to your advantage, whack in ‘crazy good’ pupillage applications and otherwise help you keep your head while all around you other would-be barristers are losing theirs.

It provides a no-nonsense guide to Pupillage Portal best practice which should stand any pupillage-seeker in good stead when going about those dreaded applications. It tells the applicant how, what and when to click, with additional computer mouse exercises for those who aren’t ‘natural mousers’.  What’s more, it comes with helpful pointers on exactly what chambers are looking for in candidates and a chapter dedicated to never-seen-before secrets of what’s really necessary to gain a pupillage. 

The later chapters are jam-packed with interview techniques and a sure-fire list of how to flirt, lie and possibly kill beg your way into a pupillage – should you get that far.

What everyone’s saying:

“Long overdue” – Lawyers of Tomorrow

“If you’re looking to maximise your negligible chances of gaining a pupillage, this book gives you the competitive edge you’ll need to out-compete your peers”, immoral BVC tutor, receiving a cut of the book’s sales.

“It’s like a personal trainer for pup-port apps”, Abigail, 23, fond of shortening words.

“It’s high time such a book hit the bookstores” – God knows.

“Lovely stuff” – Shakin’ Stevens

“This book’s perfect for the IT-adverse, the mindless chancers out there and all of the other hopefuls who have suffered too much past rejection and have just plain-run-out-of –ideas.”  - The Modern Barrister.

At just £14.99, can you afford NOT to buy a copy of The Pupillage Portal for Cretins today?  pupillage portal availability

Buy The Pupillage Portal for Cretins and get a FREE BAR* of choc-actually – the perfect treat to get you through those mind-numbing applications!!

It’s the chocolate for the Pupillage Portal season.

choc actually  - chocolate for lawyers

*While stocks last.


Saturday, 10 April 2010

Toilet Seat Up or Down: Pros and Cons

Another corker found via Digg:toilet seat up or down

Interesting argument, though I’m not sure many ladies would agree!  :-)

Friday, 9 April 2010

What kind of blawger are you?

I realise I’m pushing my luck with this one a bit but I’m hoping the ‘sphere take it with good-humoured grace that typically characterises us all! :-)  Or I might just get a slap from Andro again!

But surely, being able to laugh at yourself is the sign of a good, down-to-earth blawger?


What it really means

We Say


Most likely to be

The intermittent blawger

You’re kind of a hardcore blogger, just without the hardcore bit

Good job. When you can be bothered, that is

A bit more dedication :p

Lost London Law Student, Swiss Tony,
Curious Black Cat

The over-productive blawger

You’ve too much spare time on your hands ;-)

You can have too much of a good thing

Easing off the gas sometimes

Charon QC,


I’m on my soapbox and there’s no getting me off it

You’re a cyberspatial busy-body

We like human rights but not this much ;-)

Mind bending drugs

Ramblings of a Scottish Student,

Law Actually (re. Facebook… kind of)

The Moaner

You like nothing better than a good bitch about something

Blogging is your outlet – we get t.

A long hot soak in the bath


Law Actually

Disappeared without trace

Well, we’re not really sure. Perhaps you were murdered?

Oh well

Leaving a suicide note next time

Lackluster Lawyer, Lacunae, Diary of a Law Student and all the rest

The Scaredy Cat

You tried it; you were perhaps even quite good. Then you lost your nerve ;-)

Come back – no one’s really after you!

Growing a pair? Just kidding ;-)

ASP Bites,

Legally Ginge

I’ll disappear for months on end and then reappear (kind of)

You’re in and out of the ‘sphere like a …

I don’t know what.

Welcome back. Hello?

Oh, you’ve gone again then.

Sticking around :p

Law Minx,

Law Dent

The Specific-Interest blawger

It’s your thing and you want the world to know! 

Keeping it to yourself is the new sharing :p

Not posting music videos, pics of half-naked guys or of your recently painted nails


that blog about nail varnish etc.

Thursday, 8 April 2010

A very sad day for legal research

legal research tragedy Well, my legal research at least.

Yes, it's official. The university at which I completed my LLM has finally suspended my IT account meaning I've lost access to the plethora of precious legal databases which all law students are groomed to fall in love with. It’s just as well I got that paper written before the end of last month, eh, and spent the past few weeks downloading just about everything from Lexis’ Forms and Precedents that I think I’ll need for the future.

Just kidding. Or am I? ;-)

Actually, I'm surprised it's taken them this long to deactivate it. The uni I was at during my undergrad years, suspended accounts with the eagerness of an overzealous guillotine operator from the French Revolution. I found this out to my detriment whilst studying abroad on the ERASMUS scheme!

As we’d got to March, I was beginning to hope they might leave me 'on their books' until the next cohort were enrolled in September.  Obviously my luck didn’t hold.  A very sad day indeed. :-(

Tuesday, 6 April 2010

Man sues pet store after slipping in…

Royalty-Free Stock Imagery by Rubberball Yes, you guessed it.  And I would imagine it wasn’t pretty!

From Los Angeles Times 03/04/10:

A Virginia man is suing PetSmart for $1 million after he slipped in a pile of you-know-what at a Newport News store location during a trip to purchase dog food and bird seed in early 2009.

The man, Robert Holloway, says he badly injured his back, requiring surgery, and lost four false teeth in the incident.

Wow – I hope he didn’t go face-down in the stuff! Else that really would be adding insult to injury.

The suit alleges that PetSmart staff "negligently allowed animals to enter the premises and deposit feces in such a manner as to create a dangerous and hazardous condition," according to documents acquired by the Virginian-Pilot. Goodove says Holloway didn't see the feces because they blended in with the color of the store's floor.

Fancy. What a charming shade that floor must be.

The Virginian-Pilot reports that the suit was initially filed in Norfolk Circuit Court, but PetSmart succeeded in getting it moved to U.S. District Court, where a similar suit against the company was dismissed in 2008.

In court documents, PetSmart denied the allegation of negligence, according to the Associated Press.

It puts the odd grape left rolling about in a supermarket car park in perspective, I guess.  Whether PetSmart are found to have been negligent in not spotting the offending pile and getting the poop scoop out is another matter, of course.

Monday, 5 April 2010

Don’t ya just hate it when…

I don’t listen to music or podcasts at work (obviously) but I do quite often outside of work when I’m tinkering away on my ‘puter.  And yes, this has happened to me a few times over the years – though I’m not distracted by cats, thank God.common computing occurrence

Found via Digg (as ever)!

Saturday, 3 April 2010

Wacky Search Terms March 2010

law actually search terms march “risotto accident” – I’m guessing this either resulted in a personal injury claim or an urgent trip to the bathroom! Or possibly both! ;-)

“open university llb crap” – I’m sure it’s not that bad!

“chocolate lawyers” – I could have made a choc-actually version for Easter – along the same theme as a hollow bunny.

“law only law nice websites” - Oh please, don't tell me law actually is a 'nice' website.

“hot pubis” - oh dear.  An overheating pelvis can never be a good thing!  :-$

“what is the preferred font for a legal letter?” - that is actually a good question - any ideas?

“stray sperm in law” – Not quite sure how to interpret that!

“real life experiences in hell” – LOL, and came back to tell the tale, eh?

“cheapest llb uk” - Remember - you get what you pay for!  :p

“law cases involving sentimental loss of plant uk” – oh bless. You’ll be lucky.

“what do you do if you poke yourself in the eye and see blck dots” – well, for starters, I’d guess you’d say, “ouch, that hurt”. :-$

“woman awarded damages attacted by cow” – I should think so too, given that she was so wrongfully ‘attacted’!

“who did charlotte dymond cheat with” - fancy trying to suggest that Charlotte was a bit of a hussy.  

“pubic hair pimples” - wow... sounds painful!  :p

“LPC Student blog” - thanks, curious visitor on the network at Mogers Solicitors in Bath.  Leave a comment next time, eh?  :p

“what is the law on puke at work” - try not to, would be some good advice.

“what does experience with dictaphone mean” – I hope it’s not a pre-requisite for a job offer!

“what chat site do cops go on” – www.copsreunited dot com

“uk privacy laws bedroom window” - I smell a pervert.

“why should me wear seatbelt” – as through windscreen you might go! :p

“what makes a good stockroom assistant” – long arms, a willing attitude and plenty of deodorant I’d guess.

Friday, 2 April 2010

Inappropriate pictures for Easter: off-putting urinals

I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to share this, regardless of how inappropriate the timing might be.holypee_fullsize
Which in turn reminded of this picture I found ages ago:

off-putting urinals

I know – I should have better taste!