A pizza the action

pizza samuraiFrom Stupid Criminals (Discovery.com) 30/05/11:

Wynika Mason ... had a beef (we can't verify if that is a figure of speech or an actual topping in the dispute) with employees at a Louisville Pizza Hut.

Witty. Really witty. Who me?

Suddenly, out of a sheath [shouldn’t that be ‘scabbard’?] she pulled a full-sized sword, apparently intending to go all medieval on the workers. Unfortunately, her threat oozed [really – it ‘oozed’? I didn’t know threats did that] beyond her intended victims and spread to her fellow pizza patrons. Giant swords are like that.

Her brother diffused the situation before police arrived by disarming Wynika and placing the sword in his car. Just the same, once the authorities arrived our would-be Captain Jacqueline Sparrow [oooh, witty] was arrested for disorderly conduct and menacing.

Really? Is that all?  For taking a sword to pizza hut?

I wonder what she’ll raise in mitigation.  The fact she was planning to order a thick crust?  The restaurant's own cutlery was inadequate?   Anyway, isn’t pizza meant to be finger-food?


This whole episode just reinforces our contention that all pizza was meant to be delivered.

Or just avoided perhaps. I’ve always found it rather over-rated to be honest.


  1. As this is America, she could also blether on about her constitutional right to bear arms...


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